35 years. I’ve been alive for 35 years as of Friday.
More and more, I’m noticing places in my life where I’ve been skirting responsibility, apologizing for choices I’ve made that actually feel good for me (despite going against what people expect of me, even myself), minimizing the work I’ve done, and even avoiding stepping up where I really need to step the eff up and do the work, instead of just procrastinating and waiting for something to happen to make it happen.
And it’s not always easy to see where I’m not stepping up. I have blindspots, just like everyone else. So, I’m grateful now for the awareness I have, and the people and experiences that illuminate them for me.
Because when you know better, you do better.
Hopefully anyway.
It’s all a work in progress. Even 35 years in… All I know is that I expect it to get better from here. And that also means that I need to do what I can to make myself better—to learn, grow, keep my mind and heart open, and take action as I need to.
The call to stand up in myself, for myself, and toward the life I want is like a blaring fire alarm right now. Like I conceptually know the things I need to do and why… and now it’s like they are demanding the care and attention I’ve been avoiding giving them.
Change is coming, though it may not be visible to anyone else right now. Just know this…
Your age is not an expiration date, ever.
You can always choose differently. In fact, I’d expect it if you’re constantly learning and growing. Life is meant to challenge us to reveal where our path truly lies. It’s okay to shift as more becomes illuminated for you.
There’s always room for growth and change.
And there’s still time for you to write your book.
Must be these new moon solar eclipse vibes landing right on my birthday/solar return triggering all this… Whatever the reason, I’m here for it.
Here are a few questions to see what might be revealing itself to you right now:
What pieces of your past are bubbling up to your attention? Ask them why they are coming to your awareness now.
What have you been avoiding? Why?
Where are you hoping someone else will swoop in and take care of it? Why?
What are you procrastinating on? Why?
What/who do you need to forgive so you can let go and move forward?
Where are you being hard on yourself? Why?
Where can you offer yourself more grace and compassion?
And finally… Put your hand on your heart, breathe a few times, and ask:
What does my heart want me to know right now?
What is it my soul asks of me right now?
It’s a great weekend for introspection with the solar eclipse yesterday, so feel free to muse or journal on these questions. I know I have been.
Your contribution to the world is undeniable when you finally embrace who you are as an individual.
The ideas, thoughts, and desires you have that may appear different from the mainstream. Listen to them.
We are all individuals for a reason and we all have individual desires.
When we all look within to find what it is we are made for in this world, everything is taken care of as every dream, desire, and passion is different from others.
Some love to make a cleaner world, some love to add beauty to it, some love to solve problems and provide unique solutions, and some are just here to live and love life to inspire others to do the same.
Even if the desire isn’t clear, trusting what feels good is always a good way to go.
Let your unique individual dreams come through.
Sit with yourself this full moon and ask:
What do I ultimately desire in this one precious life?
And see what comes to you.
There’s so much you’re able to give if you just let yourself give into the desires of your heart. When you give in to those desires, you serve the world because you serve your soul…
And your soul’s highest calling is to serve the world in only the way that you can.
Love and blessings to you.
* * *
Did this channeled message spark something in you? Did it help you in some way? Share this post or share what resonated with you by leaving a comment!
This is the phrase that came to me this week in a future-self meditation I did for the new moon in Leo.
Do you have any practices you like to engage in around times, seasons, or planetary markers to check in with yourself? I’d love to hear about it!
In this meditation, provided by the CHANI app, I saw myself on my last day on Earth, surrounded by books and loved ones. At first, I almost recoiled from the guided visualization when it suggested visiting your last day on earth since I have no interest in knowing when/where my last day will be. But then, I just let that go and let the experience take me on the journey anyway.
And before the prompt even came to ask what was most important to my future self… I heard, “I left nothing unsaid.”
Rang straight like a bell and has stuck with me ever since.
So, naturally, my curiosity started brewing…
What does this mean: to leave nothing unsaid?
And what does it mean for me, specifically?
I have some ideas.
In leaving nothing unsaid…
I finish all the books in my heart in this life.
I tell the people I love how much I love them and appreciate their presence in my life. Often.
I communicate my newfound boundaries clearly and kindly, knowing that my needs matter, too.
I know my voice has an impact—it’s safe and okay for me to speak up.
I speak from my heart when love wants to come through.
I trust that what’s on my heart to share is what’s perfect in that moment.
And I’m supposed to be a writer. Literally… That’s what I’m here for.
Anything else is just the cherry on top.
In this meditation, I was at peace. I was at peace with what I created. I knew I created and wrote and put to the page so many stories that help, heal, and entertain others. Reminding people of their potential, the light and inner child within, and the magic that can be found in the everyday.
I truly had the sense that I left nothing unsaid. I said everything I needed to. I told all the stories I needed to. I told all the stories in my heart and thumping in my womb (a healer told me that once). I helped to create stories that expanded beyond the page, even. My words healed, transformed, and inspired me as I created them—just as I hoped and trusted they would heal, transform, and inspire others as well.
I’m also willing to explore all the ways “to leave nothing unsaid” will show up in my experience.
I suppose this is the mantra to guide me right now… So, that’s where my priorities need to be.
To leave nothing unsaid.
Does this statement strike anything for you?
What would it mean to you if you were to “leave nothing unsaid”?
Does it mean to speak nothing but your truth for the rest of your days?
Does it mean to pen every story, song, poem, or other creation that deigns to cross your mind?
Does it mean speaking up when something is wrong, not right, or disrespect has been done?
Does it mean to speak your mind honestly when someone asks what you think? Or even when they don’t ask?
Does it mean to use your voice for others who can’t speak for themselves or those who could use a boost of additional voices?
Does it mean expressing your love and appreciation in more ways than just words?
And could it possibly mean, saying no more than you need to so you can also listen to what’s also being “unsaid” yet communicated anyway?
Perhaps this is an opportunity for you to ask yourself:
What is it I want to feel at the end of the day?
Is this something you’d like to explore with me? I invite you to chime in in the comments. <3
